Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Tales: Man's Ego & Rules

Importance: Low

The Man Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

At last a guy, Monsieur BayiSingh

has taken the time to write this all down


Finally , the guys' side of the story.


We always hear ' the rules'
From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.

Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '


1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining

about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers

to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem
only

if you want help solving it. That's what we do.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible

in an argument.
In fact, all comments become

Null and void after 7 Days..


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us..

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways

and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it,

just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever

you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did
NOT need directions

and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors,

like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not
A color.

Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it
will be scratched.
We do that .

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,'

We will act like nothing's wrong..
We know you are lying,

but it is just not worth the hassle.

1.. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,

Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere,

absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless

you are prepared to discuss topics

such as football or F1.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.
Round IS a shape!


Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a lift of their ego.

Pass this to as many women as you can -

to give them a test of their bigger ego.


Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, You'll have to sleep on the couch tonight;

Just try to Blame it on BayiSingh;

it may work!

But did you know men really don't mind that! ?

It's like camping.

14 comments:

Pak Zawi said...

Great one. Enjoyed every bit of it.

Jefus said...

A HUSBAND COMES HOME FROM CHURCH;

HE GREETS HIS WIFE AND LIFTS HER UP. HE THEN CARRIED HER AROUND THE HOUSE.

THE WIFE WAS SO SURPRISED AND SHE ASKED
'DID THE BISHOP PREACH ABOUT BEING ROMANTIC'?

THE HUSBAND SAID, 'NO, HE SAID WE MUST CARRY OUR BURDENS AND SORROWS'

Unknown said...

Every points got me at hello....

Hope said...

From a woman's point of view, I think men are as complicated as women, but of course we love you anyway together with everything that comes in between - the late nights of football (where we have to do the cleaning up the next morning), the damp towel on the bed, the compliments we never received after spending 3 hrs at the hair salon and the list goes on :p

Chicken Ball said...

LOL!

My fren! Are you into some trouble!!?? LMAO!!

Anonymous said...

To Bayi ... do you practise what you preach?

To Maverick ... would you practise what Bayi preaches?

As for me ... that has always been the case and i love my couch ;-)

Cheers people!

bayi said...

ewoon

I think Maverick has the answer! :)

Anonymous said...

what does the future hold for malaysia?

Dooms??

There are so much of uncertainty!

I am really thinking of bringing my family to migrate for good.

Is even harder to be husband now than during my father times!

Anonymous said...

Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and look at him... instead of reaching the India he was hoping for, he ended up on the other side of the world

Maverick SM said...

Zawi,

You also like me....

hehehehe!!!

Jefus,

This one is a great one!LOL!

Terang Bulan,

Hello! You got another.

Hopeful,

Men not so complicated lah...

Chicken Ball,

Ya lo!!

Ewoon,

Ya, I am trying hard; thanks to Bayi.

Bayi,

I got what answer, bayi?

Edi,

No lah; husband easy, becoming a wife more difficult for man.

Anonymous said...

AGE OF A WOMAN

Between the ages of 15 - 20 A woman is like Sabah ..
She is half discovered, half wild

Between the ages of 20 - 30 A woman is like Putrajaya,
Fully discovered and scientifically perfect

Between the ages of 30 - 35 She is like Kelantan,
Very hot, wise and beautiful

Between the ages of 35 - 40 A woman is like Johore,
She is half destroyed but still desirable

Between the ages of 40 - 50 She is like Kuala Lumpur ,
Old but still got hope

Between the ages of 50 - 60 She is like Sarawak,
Very wide, very quiet but nobody goes there

Between the ages of 60 - 70 A woman is like Malacca,
With a glorious past but no future

Anonymous said...

Witty and funny, I just can't stop laughing today..

Maverick SM said...

Kittykat Honey,

You are enjoying yourself...

Anonymous said...

very much..thank you