A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it.... don'twaste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding upyour heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you canextend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
Q:What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! .... Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best! feel-good food around!
Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A:If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.
Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! ! 'Round' is a shape!
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Lessons Learned:
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.
And remember:
'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body.
AND.....
For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health:
1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
6. The Perakians eats nothing about anything and suffers much more heart attacks than Americans.
7. Umnos eats everything except pork and never suffered heart attack.
CONCLUSION
Eat and drink what you like.
Speaking English is apparently what kills you.
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Contributed by: Sawewe
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11 comments:
Speaking English is apparently what kills you.
So that's the reason some people are trying to end the teaching of science and mathematics in English.
so joint AMINO, you can continue eating including PETRI!
and in amno, they also hunt down and blow up mongolian women to keep fit.
see your bn rep, terror man !
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Jh6Ei13zW8&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Fsemutmalaysia.blogspot.com%2F2009%2F05%2Flancau-lu-shaarani.html&feature=player_embedded
swine flu hits ipoh on 7th May...
brought on by the virus H1N1 aka HeeOne-NajisOne
Perakian has
-no skyscraper at the city,
-airport but not in service,
-no full-fledged public university,
-less job opportunities,
-no oncologist(no radiotherapy
and no Chemotherapy) in IGH,
......and get bullied.
"kiss me thru the phone and see you later on...." that's what after eating too much meat and drink too much beer!
H1N1 is ON!! after Hee meet eye-to-eye and kiss thru the phone with Najis....
Shittie yeak!
"kiss me thru the phone and see you later on...." that's what after eating too much meat and drink too much beer!
H1N1 is ON!! after Hee meet eye-to-eye and kiss thru the phone with Najis....
Shittie yeak!
Ir's better for me to make some correction before....
With airport but unable to fulfill demands.
Long list of appointments because oncologist has to travel between KL and Ipoh. No radiotherapy and Chemotherapy treatments in IGH.
Hilarious!
I hope you don't mind me putting this on my blog.
well dressed 'swine' grabbing each other's buttock, breasts, legs, hands and crotch, ouch!
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