Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Jokes from Malaysian Court of Law

Extract of the TBH Coroner's inquiry between Malaysian Prosecutor and the forensic expert from Thailand.

Abdul Razak representing the Public Prosecutor's Office
Dr. Porntip Rojanasunand Thai pathologist.
__________________________________

ABDUL RAZAK: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep,he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
PORNTIP: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________________________________

ABDUL RAZAK: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
PORNTIP: All of them...The living ones put up too much of a fight.
_______________________________________

ABDUL RAZAK: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
PORNTIP: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

ABDUL RAZAK: And Teoh Beng Hock was dead at the time?
PORNTIP: If he was not dead, he would be dead by the time I finished autopsy.

ABDUL RAZAK: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
PORNTIP: No.

ABDUL RAZAK: Did you check for blood pressure?
PORNTIP: No.

ABDUL RAZAK: Did you check for breathing?
PORNTIP: No.

ABDUL RAZAK: So, then is it possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
PORNTIP: No.

ABDUL RAZAK: How can you be so sure, doctor?
PORNTIP: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

ABDUL RAZAK: I see, but could the patient be still alive nevertheless?
PORNTIP: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

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INTELLECTUAL DISCOURSE ...

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

This "lawyer" is a disgrace to Malaysian lawyers.

EdiÁ•ě said...

so funni... the lawayer....

Anonymous said...

Oh, btw, where has this Razak loyar gone? Haven't heard about him since the very funny incident in court. Poor man... must be suffering from this maluation disease..!

BH Toh said...

Marverick,
"Extract of the TBH Coroner's inquiry between Malaysian Prosecutor and the forensic expert from Thailand.
"???

Knowing our Pdrm, you are asking for trouble!. When did this exactly happened? You did not qualify yourself - title "jokes from malaysian court" implied these were extracts from the real case that you find funny.

Personally I know it's a joke but..

Maverick SM said...

BH,

Don't worry about me. I know what I wrote. They are also my buddies ....

Enjoy my jokes and I will take care of jokers.

Maverick SM said...

Edi,

He wasn't funny he's clown!!!

Anonymous said...

I see NO joke in a growing disability within the HR development of a nation.

This Razak loyar is ONLY a small sample of the so called qualified professionals that Bolihland has 'managed' to educate & 'create'.

Engineers, who cant perform a decent calculation on a simulation. Thus collapsed roof & ceiling within buildings. Burst pipes due to 'laughable' pressure guestimation.

Doctors over-subscribe vitamin & antibiotic for No confidence in illness diagnostic. Surgeons handling scalpel like butcher. any wonder about the increase in medical mal-pratices?

Accountants cant clearly distinguish liability & asset. Thus performing number acrobatic to balance the book. Even the auditors want a easy way out. So how to catch a white-collar fraud?

These examples r too numerous to be a joke!

Years of quota & markah buta to increase quantity to the detriment of quality & proffesional ethic, just to syok-sendiri.

Titles ada, tapi skill zilch. Thus most prefer to push papers & talk BIG. especially within the public sector!

Truly form over substance.

So, how to be competitive while dreaming about durian runtuh?

Hello, Zimbabwe....

Anonymous said...

Why did Saiful run away from office?
He didn't like his care-reared.

Did you hear about the Anwar's letter?
Only came in male boxes.

What does a Anwar and an ambulance have in common?
They both get loaded from the rear and go whoo-whoo!

From Lee Wat Yew with love

Anonymous said...

This lawyer had better not say where he graduated from. Uni malu lah!

loyarburuk said...

Did this loyar ACTUALLY graduate? Can someone verrify his quali again?