Jokes for Today

STORY 1:

Condom says to Kotex, "When you work, I lose seven days of business."

Kotex replies, "If you fail to work once, my business stops for nine months."


STORY 2:

A black guy and a white girl met at a nite club. She took him to her apartment and said:

"tie me to the bed and do what black men do best!"

... so he ran off with the TV and DCD player...


STORY 3:


Wife: "I wish I were a newspaper, so you can hold me every morning!"

Husband: "I wish you're a newspaper TOO, my dear soI can have a NEW ONE every morning!


STORY 4:

A Chinese couple got married. When baby girl was born, her eyes were big and blue, hair was curly and blonde, skin was brown.

At the registrar, the Chinese officer asked the husband: "What's your name?"

Husband: Sum Ah Kow

Officer: Is that your child? What's her name?

Husband: " Something wrong, officer".

Finally, baby's name was registered as: Sum Ting Long


STORY 5:

Phone rings and Filipina maid calls out loud to her master who was bathing. The master was bathing and asked her to pick it up.

She picks up the phone .....

When the caller asked what's he doing, the maid Replied: "MASTUR BATING."(master bathing)


STORY 6:

A camel and an elephant met, and the elephant asked: "Why do you have your tits on your back?"

The camel responded: "What a silly question from someone who has a dick on his face!"


STORY 7:


A lady visited her doctor one morning.

Doc said: "You look so weak and exhausted! Are you eating your meals 3 times a day as I advised?

Lady : "Doc, I thought you said 3 males a day!"